Mak Kong

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[-] - published by Sega. Average Reader Rating: 5.64

 


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2020-02-06
From: Nam Vet   (
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Comments: I feel as if you gave this game two dollars, it would love you long time. I don't know why I feel that way. I just do. Okay! Come on!

Rating:

2012-08-24
From: BluBlaDe   (
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Comments: Skinny bitches riding cocks are better.

Rating: n/a

2012-07-28
From: Peter   (
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Comments: Scott, you really do have your moments. You always seemed like the king of the dipshits around here if you ask me, but you really do have moments of genuine insight and intellectual clarity. Squirting porn does, indeed, suck and I don't buy that shit for a moment, either. Not as bad as the fake cum-blasting fad of the past few years, though, because at least with the squirting crap you're guaranteed to see beaucoup pussy.

Rating: n/a

2011-12-03
From: BluBlaDe   (
more)
Comments: Female should just lay down and takes our cocks. Who the fuck cares if they orgasm or what ? Objects does not have feelings, do they ?

Rating: n/a

2011-12-03
From: Scott   (
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Comments: If there's one thing I like watching it's...well, it's football. But if there are two things I like watching, one is football, the other is super skinny bitches riding giant dildos. I hate, however, the so-called "squirting" genre of porn. Now, I'm not sure of the exact nature of female ejaculation or whether it truly even exists, but I do know it isn't THAT. Yeah, congratulations bitch, you just pissed on a couch. Not fooling me, honey.

Rating: n/a

2011-09-06
From: Sheryl Crow   (
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Comments: That's out of line, Peter. He has one functioning testicle and that's all that one really needs. No, Lance's problem isn't a lack of testosterone, it's that he's a complete and total asshole that has no respect for anyone other than himself. My pussy is so wet right now, Lance, bet you sure miss it, don't you? Right now I'm filling my sex with my biggest and blackest dildo and it feels so fucking good. You could never make me queef like I am now and I love it! It also has more personality than you, by the way. Gotta go finish!

Rating: n/a

2011-09-06
From: Peter   (
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Comments: Guess you really were doping like it was going out of style then, weren't you no nuts?

Rating: n/a

2011-09-05
From: Peter   (
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Comments: Ugh, indeed. Ken Mattingly was an astronaut. Don Mattingly is a baseball manager. Who the fuck Dan Mattingly is is anyone's guess. You have failed, sir. I shit on your very soul.

Rating: n/a

2011-09-04
From: Dan Mattingly   (
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Comments: Ugghhhh, Jim Lovell new how to stink up a Space Capsual. I swear his shit stunk the worst. Everytime he reached for a fecal bag, I would think "oh crap, here comes the stink!"

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2011-09-03
From: Andrew Chaikin   (
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Comments: Contrary to what "Buzz" says below, my research has shown that all astronauts possessed above average cranks in terms of both length and girth. Is that what made them great? No, but it does explain somewhat the difficulties place on astronauts' personal relationships. A lot of women don't like a large penis, my wife tells me so all the time.

Rating: n/a

2011-07-07
From: Paul   (
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Comments: All the other nonsense aside, does anyone know what the hell this game is even about?

Rating: n/a

2011-05-22
From: the voices!!!!   (
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Comments: lies are often more clever than truth, but which is this??

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
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Comments: Okay, let's continue: "Yi Il" is a reference to the 16th century Japanese invasion of Korea, Mao Zedong, the influence of the Korean War on the Vietnam War, the presence of Soviet premier Alexei Kosygin in Vietnam during the start of Operation Rolling Thunder, the flea-killing properties of diatomaceous earth, molluscum contagiosum (a relatively benign STD), an obscure reference to Coast Guard participation in the Vietnam War, couvade is sympathetic pregnancy...eh, fuck this, no one is going to read it.

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: Funny, a few are actually game related, if often obliquely.

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: "The sun only makes it colder now"...that one's been bugging me, but I think it is a reference to the local weather here during winter. It either tends to be too wet and warm for snow or too clear and cold for snow. Tough on schoolchildren hoping to get a snow day.

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: Let's see what all I can remember regarding references (I'll skip ones I don't know about anymore or are self-explanatory): Elmo from Sesame Street, Bush/War on Terror, love ones that passed away, Lend-Lease, a Burger King commercial, The ports of Los Angeles and Long Beach, Atheists, a Rainbow song, racism (maybe), the Bush twins (most monkey references are to George W. Bush), Hottentot aprons (elongated labia), daxma (Zoroastrian custom of placing the dead for vultures to eat), Popocatepetl (volcano in Mexico), Neville Chamberlain, Reagan versus Qaddafi, James Oberg and KAL flight 007, pornstar Taylor Rain, the Strait of Juan de Fuca, the Juan de Fuca plate subducting under the North American plate, Huygens probe landing on Saturn's moon Titan (the ESA's greatest moment)...uh, that's enough for now.

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: Hmm...after further readings, I guess there is a good solid helping of nonsense, with references to Qaddafi, Reagan, Bush, Saddam Hussein, Brezhnev and the like sprinkled liberally throughout. Oh yes, and two Juan de Fuca related posts.

Rating: n/a

2011-04-24
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: It's been so long, I can't remember what some of them mean. Relatively few are actually nonsense.

Rating: n/a

2010-01-07
From: STFU camel   (
more)
Comments: OH hell yea the I love the voices! Its like my own personal daily horroscope.....btw this is the most useless game ever..... 1 Alex!

Rating:

2009-03-17
From: Turd   (
more)
Comments: Shitting oxygen!!!

Rating:

2007-01-31
From: Sam   (
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Comments: i noticed you havent posted for a long time.... where u been? haha

Rating:

2007-01-30
From: Peter   (
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Comments: Oops, I meant "yes, I appreciate it", but somehow my brain was thinking "no, I don't mind" or the like. That's syphilis, for you. I guess I'm a bit out of practice at this, too.

Rating: n/a

2007-01-30
From: Peter   (
more)
Comments: No, it's good to see some of them again.

Rating: n/a

2007-01-29
From: Sam   (
more)
Comments: hope Peter appriciates me resurecting all his voices posts.... because i thought they were great a bit.

Rating:

2007-01-23
From: Classic Comment   (
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Comments: Captain Silver 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: long have i been away. too long. i awoke from my slumber with my dignity stolen, my genitals bruised. what a wonderful whore Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Teddy Boy 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: rejoice!!! Onan's sin was that of coitus interruptus, not self-abuse! now you bastards can busy yourselves beating your meat instead of beating you bibles and crying for amendments every time you backward babies don't get your way. pornography is the answer!! it's wisdom will rouse us all Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Double Dragon 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you red monster!!! you've brainwashed my nephew! you'll pay for this!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Phantasy Star 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: emboldened by your past failures, you endanger us all. damn you, monkey!!! damn you to hell!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fantasy Zone 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: our collective enemies are beyond your reckoning, monkey! you cannot bomb them away, there will only be more. you can shoot them, but won't they be replaced in earnest? you have failed. you have made things worse Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Arcade Smash Hits 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i miss my friends. where did they go?? i will be with them again, one day. we all will Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Altered Beast 2005-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the eagle thinks he was more helpful than he was. the bear thinks the eagle was not really helpful at all. both of them are wrong, yet also right. the truth is in the middle, seen only by me Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Master Games 1 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i've got the juice. do you want it??? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Paperboy 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: combined, they would be the third largest such thing in the world. of what do i speak?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Joe Montana Football 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: Amala and Kamala. raised by wolves. remarkable, but what is in it for a wolf? such creatures could teach us much Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mirracle Warriors 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i know it seems silly to you in your arrogance, but you know no better than they. prove them wrong. you can't, can you? fools Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- TransBot 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: despite what anyone may say or think, i am not the man on the silver mountain. that was years ago Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Super Monaco GP 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: happiness is a young Korean girl giving you handjobs while wearing woolen mittens. they are soft and scratchy at once. the absorbency is also to be appreciated Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- California Games 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you see differences that aren't really there. change your ways Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Hero 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: a group of monkeys won't repect you until you kill their leader. after that, you'll get all the monkey pussy you want Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rainbow Islands 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: gee, your snatch smells terrific!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ys: The Vanished Omens 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: it has something to do with the chowder. such persistent erections are rare. Manhattan style doesn't do it. i must now find my relief Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Action Fighter 2005-03-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: what to do now, monkey? they are whores because of you. they act out because of your hypocrisy Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex Kidd in High Tech World 2005-03-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i am sui generis. he is not me. i watch him closely Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shinobi 2005-03-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: what i did last evening will not be repeated, but it needed to be done. i record my thoughts here, i do not need interaction. clarification was necessary, however Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rambo III 2005-02-21 From: the voices!!!! Comments: not as easy as it seems, is it?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Choplifter 2005-02-21 From: the voices!!!! Comments: it is good that potatoes don't feel pain, but sometimes i wish they did. i can only imagine their anguished screams as i cut the little bastards open!! die, starchy fucker, die!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ghost House 2005-02-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: thus he spoke, "as long as you have a mother, i have a place to rest my balls". he laughed uneasily for a moment. i just smiled. then a flash of silver as my blade cut deeply into him. the noise that was made by his entrails as they slid from his gut and tumbled out onto the snow is indescribable. some things you just don't joke about Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Golden Axe Warrior 2005-02-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the dark ones can see you through the mists of time. oh...you're masturbating again Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tom and Jerry 2005-02-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: like the old song says, everybody loves a clown. unfortunately for my father, sodomy laws vary from state to state Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Strider 2005-02-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i was tied not to her apron strings, but to her hottentot apron itself (themselves). sublimely pendant Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Captain Silver 2005-02-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: daxma. even in that momentary victory of evil, there is to be found no greater gift. daxma Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Hero 2005-02-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: yes....this one sees the truth!!! long has this been sought. may your wisdom break through the darkness like the fiery vomit of El Popo. ah, you see, don't you?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Parlour Games 2005-02-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: this may be the day foretold to me years ago, encoded into the already incomprehensible Ziggy comic strip. the truth can be more cryptic than their greatest lies. i am glad there may be another who sees: when a bear defecates in the woods, it does make a sound Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kenseiden 2005-02-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you are close to the answers you seek. do not let the grasping wastrels slow you down, you've come too far now. the great Pongo is smiling down on us both. he knows their lies best of all. his righteous anger is soon to be unleashed upon the surface of this world like a prolapsed uterus Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Operation Wolf 2005-02-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: he knew the limits of what could be accomplished. buying time was all that could be done, though at too steep a price. there is no use to slander him now Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pro Wrestling 2005-02-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: it is a sad time. there is nothing but truth in me saying that now. i am sad. will i be this way forever?? never again will i have such a friend Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2005-02-10 From: the voices!!!! Comments: one finger. two fingers. three fingers?? four fingers!! fist!!! what a beauty Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Ninja 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the flew over the Med propelled by your lies. who has killed more, the colonel or you??? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Golden Axe Warrior 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: no storm could cover your deceit, dear Jim. soon the world will know!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Out Run 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: be wary, little girls. many lack my self-control. your innocence is too much for them Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Great Volleyball 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: sodom wasn't destroyed by an angry God. indeed, i have found the very gates of the city, buried not by the desert sands, but by the thinest layer of soft cotton. remove your panties, dear. which path should i choose?? brown or pink??? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gauntlet 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i have a friend who vomits only when he is at his happiest. his name is Peter Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Ninja 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they all confused me, chanting as they did. dwarf pine!!! dwarf pine!!! when will it end?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chuck Rock 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i try so hard to reach you all, but you don't hear, you can't help yourselves. it isn't your fault, cashews are meant to be cooked first. be more careful in the future Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alien Syndrome 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: that is the sweetest rain of all, even if she is so promiscuous Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bubble Bobble 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: Juan was never here, but they named it for him anyway. such are the vagaries of discovery. an exceeding high pinnacle Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lemmings 2005-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: don't you see?? the sun only makes it colder now!! the horror!!! the horror!!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chuck Rock 2005-02-06 From: the voices!!!! Comments: subduct, you bastard, subduct!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Enduro Racer 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: seas of methane?? try to steal that, you damn communists!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Ottifants 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: prescription has run out. my enemies will now be taught hard lessons. their next of kin will learn of diminished capacity. i will strike with impunity Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Golden Axe 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: criticism has stung me. my heart is blacker than before. remorse? it is gone, never to return Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Teddy Boy 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: flames leapt up, touching the sky. "my house, my house!!!", she screamed. don't hang up on me Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ys: The Vanished Omens 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: lisa leases out limpets on the littoral. running a small business is difficult. good luck, lisa Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Psycho Fox 2005-01-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: 8:30 a.m.- she leaves for work, same time every day. what beauty and grace 8:35 a.m.- now inside her house. fed cat brand name cat food, not generic crap 8:40 a.m.- went to her bedroom, laid out lovely floral pattern dress on bed, placed near life-sized photo of her face on dress where her head would be 8:45 a.m.- cried for about an hour 9:40 a.m.- removed clothing and masturbated, ejaculating on her pillow 10:05 a.m.- watched back to back episodes of Perry Mason, making note of the rare beauty of Barbara Hale. put clothes back on 12:05 p.m.- got early lunch at Subway. roasted chicken sandwich excellent 12:45 p.m.- back in apartment. removed clothing, took nap on her bed 2:10 p.m.- shit in her bathtub, used fecal rod to scrawl out crude love poem: roses are red, this poop is brown, i love vaginas, let me go down 2:30 p.m.- took shower, made use of terrific smelling soap 2:50 p.m.- shave pubic hair 3:10 p.m.- went to kitchen, found watermelon and cut hole in the bottom of it 3:15 p.m.- placed double-sided tape around hole in watermelon. stuck pubic hair onto tape 3:25 p.m.- returned to bedroom, placed watermelon inside of dress with hole towards bottom of dress 3:27 p.m.- stood thinking of her, got erection 3:29 p.m.- squatted on bed at bottom of dress. lifted dress, held top of watermelon and pushed inside makeshift vagina. began vigorous thrusting 4:10 p.m.- climaxed inside watermelon 4:12 p.m.- took another shower 4:33 p.m.- looked through hamper, smelled panties, bras, stockings, and pantyhose 4:40 p.m.- masturbated again with argyle sock placed over penis 4:50 p.m.- put sock on pillow next to dried semen from earlier emission 4:55 p.m.- looked through her nightstand, found phallic vibrator 5:00 p.m.- placed vibrator inside watermelon/pussy. straightened dress 5:05 p.m.- fed cat again. vitality formula food 5:15 p.m.- left house, waited in car for her return 6:11 p.m.- she returned from work, went inside. 6:14 p.m.- audible scream heard. waited 6:41 p.m.- police arrived and went inside. slowly pulled away and drove home 7:07 p.m.- arrived home, had modest dinner and watched television 10:00 p.m.- watched local news 10:30 p.m.- set alarm for morning Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shinobi 2005-01-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: he was trying to help you, Yi Il. Why would you cut his head off?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shanghai 2005-01-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you rail against them and call them "revisionists", but whose crimes are worse, chairman??? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Secret Commando 2005-01-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: fools, it more resembled that of the hermit kingdom than you thought!! 200,000 volunteers waited for another such mistake. the one you hate, the one you blame, was right afterall. chicken salad can turn to chicken shit. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rambo: First Blood Part II 2005-01-02 From: the voices!!!! Comments: rolling thunder, hear my cry: you did what you thought was right, but Alexei was very upset. He turned against you that day Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Enduro Racer 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if we weren't meant to masturbate, we wouldn't be able to reach our genitals Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gangster Town 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: well, it's like the old saying goes: the road to hell is paved with good intentions. stay away, do-gooders!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Altered Beast 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the diatoms rained down upon them, but why?? my god... the fleas!!! they can't breathe!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- F-16 Fighting Falcon 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: she called them crabs, but they weren't crabs at all. horrid little fellows, yet i envy them their place of habitation Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Great Baseball 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: oh, molluscum, i'm much the worse for having known you. now you are gone. stay away! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Super Monaco GP 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i would never try to deny her her pleasure, but there is something unseemly about calling it "clamming". call it what you must, my dear, your happiness is in your own hands (fingers) Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rambo: First Blood Part II 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: odd that they didn't take the pelicans with them Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Out Run 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: it may be no garden, but it's no worse than where you live. mind your tongue Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mortal Kombat 2 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: what a fascinating thing this.... couvade. the gauls think it cowardly, do they?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ghostbusters 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: there are many things that we do not understand. why would she want me to urinate on her?? arousing? perhaps. exciting? maybe. taboo? possibly. yellow? often. oh, urolagnia!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Quartet 2004-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i know what you mean, but the same is true of the east pacific rise Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Time Soldiers 2004-11-27 From: the voices!!!! Comments: anachronistic fantasy!!! how many are taken in by this?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kenseiden 2004-11-27 From: the voices!!!! Comments: such a tidy explanation you offer, but what of the ainu?? did you even think of that? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Astro Warrior 2004-11-27 From: the voices!!!! Comments: your reputation precedes you, osprey. you are the one that should pay for your own carelessness, not me Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Phantasy Star 2004-11-27 From: the voices!!!! Comments: her beauty belied her age. she was a creature of almost infinite sexual energy. yet her foul language was too much!! what did she call it??? ah, yes....cock barf Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cloud Master 2004-11-24 From: the voices!!!! Comments: scourge of the fire god?? please. such arrogance will only serve your enemies Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shinobi 2004-11-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: we continue to fight amongst ourselves while the robots wait patiently biding their time Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sensible Soccer 2004-11-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: freshly laundered panties. they smell clean, but not good. soil them, my dear!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Captain Silver 2004-11-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: to call the gibbon a lesser ape is patronizing in the extreme. lesser than what? do they murder their own kind by the millions?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mirracle Warriors 2004-11-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: onions make us cry, but aren't we the ones enslaving them?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Action Fighter 2004-11-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? because they can see how dark your soul is! they hate you!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Star Wars 2004-11-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my favorite color is orange because it is bright, it is cheery, and because it stabs at the hearts of the infidels!! we'll get you all Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Castle of Illusion 2004-11-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: tread lightly, monkey. what could not be accomplished via the ballot can easily be done via the bullet. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rescue Mission 2004-10-30 From: the voices!!!! Comments: look at what you've done, monkey. many more yellow-legs died today for your pettiness. the ultimate price of this vendetta is the great wasting of courage and self-sacrifice of others brought about by your foolishness. their motives are just, yours are shameful. our true enemies are mocking us, you in particular, for you've aided them so much and yet are too dumb to even see it. history will look back upon your life with scorn and contempt. bask in your own ignorance and in the hollow praise that comes from those that are beneath even you. sooner or later, the world will be rid of you. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kung Fu Kid 2004-10-30 From: the voices!!!! Comments: come, my loyal fellatrix, take your sustenence!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Golvellius 2004-10-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the bear did not murder those people. no, not at all. on that day, over twenty years ago, the eagle shit on us all. we know not what you did, eagle, but we will one day. in the end, your lies will be exposed!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Incredible Hulk 2004-10-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i'm not jewish, but my penis is!! shalom, my friends Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Hero 2004-10-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they will never laugh at me again!! my little friend barks at them, spitting fire and lead. they fall to the pavement with anguished cries of pain and fear. i approach the nearest coward. he is waiting to die. the air that had filled his lungs just moments before now hisses out through a hole in his chest. should i put him out of his misery?? no. mercy belongs to the next world, suffering holds dominion over ours. it will be over soon enough. for them!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Secret Commando 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i can't feel my own eyes. i can see. i see love and hate. they are both ugly to me. what have you done?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Enduro Racer 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: crotch rocket!! that's what they call you! do you still not hate them?? fire at will, gridley!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mirracle Warriors 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: don't set a homeless person on fire unless you want to hear them scream. they beg for their lives like anyone else. the goal of equality is met only in death Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Battle Out Run 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: who weeps for lusophone africa?? i do, you worthless assholes!! i do. where is your shame?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Zillion 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i don't like the way women look at me. they say, "fill me with your penis, fill me with your sperm, make me a woman, but make me feel like a whore". am i nothing more to them?? i have feelings!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF: Steel Cage 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: people think it's all jungle, but it isn't. i guess when people think of a monsoon they automatically think of heavy rain, but the dry season is just as much a part of it. such fools!! we could laugh if it weren't so very sad! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rastan 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: a dog that can speak esperanto shouldn't be put to sleep. what a world we live in Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Great Volleyball 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they gave the appearance that they were lesbians. as it turns out, one is married, the other engaged. what a bitter pill to swallow. you've let us all down, girls!! your muse sappho weeps with grave disappointment. what man deserves you? what man deserves even the least of your sex?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ghouls and Ghosts 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i don't mind being circumcised, but what did they do with my foreskin?? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marble Madness 2004-10-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you should try not to expose your penis to strangers. however, if you feel it is absolutely necessary, do it in front of young children. they are more apt to be impressed by your size Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Klax 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: oh, monkey, have you come to believe your own lies?? your deceit will be your undoing!!...or will it be our own? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Psycho Fox 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: a hippopotamus could be pink, but think of the sunburn!! my god, the sunburn!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lord of the Sword 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: would you consider that to be typical of karst topography?? leave your answers below Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex Kidd in Miracle World 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the moon continues to move further from the earth. they blame tidal processes. i blame bigotry!! flee from our prejudice, moon, we don't deserve your radiance!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sonic the Hedgehog Chaos 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: doth not the bible say, "a ring don't plug no holes"?? wait...no it doesn't!! i owe someone an apology. his wife as well. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy in Monster Land 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: violence begets violence. one example is when you slap your girlfriend in the forehead with your erect penis. invariably, retribution will be sought in short order. this will usually mean a punch to the testicles, the grabbing and squeezing (or twisting) of the testicles, or even biting. actions have consequences. hell hath no fury like a woman hit in the face by an erect penis!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Golden Axe Warrior 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the monkey says he doesn't know the nature of homosexuality!! another lie, monkey. it's nature is your own. the truth dances through your mind like an endless parade of dangling penises. they are rendered flaccid by your hate Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Paperboy 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: is it wrong to ejaculate on pictures of girls in your high school yearbook?? generally, i would say not, but use your own yearbook. oh yes, i had an awesome summer, you whores!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy III: The Dragons Trap 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you can let a smile be your umbrella, but it won't stop your father from beating you because you got your sister pregnant Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gauntlet 2004-10-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: for a while i was dating a very tall, statuesque woman. lovely girl, nice too. as our relationship progressed i discovered that she had an unusually large clitoris, one that was the approximate size of a typical penis. the weirdest thing was that the clitoris appeared to have a urethra running through it, again much like a penis would. also...there were testicles. turns out she was a man. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ghostbusters 2004-10-11 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my home is haunted by many spirits! their unearthly voices torment me by day and night!! "why do you masturbate so much??", they ask Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Montezumas Revenge 2004-10-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: how many will die for the monkey's lies??? watch yourself, monkey. if our paths cross, you die!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Zool 2004-10-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: nothing is more enjoyable than a feast of delicious wild mushrooms!! such a sensual delight! the downside? being placed on a waiting list for a liver transplant Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Action Fighter 2004-10-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my mother warned me not to spank my monkey, but i didn't listen. come down out of the tree, bobo!! i'm sorry!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cool Spot 2004-10-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: oh, how i wish i had a vagina!! what fun it would be to see what all i could fit inside Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex Kidd in High Tech World 2004-10-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if big turds can come out, why can't penises go in?? maddening!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Psycho Fox 2004-10-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: at night the monsters approach. they want our farts Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Hero 2004-10-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: have you ever heard a queef? how glorious they are!! a sweeter wind hath never blown!! ah, to feel it kiss your face!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Penguin Land 2004-10-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if baby seals could talk it would be harder to club them Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bubble Bobble 2004-10-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if pornography has taught us anything, it's that women like to be ejaculated on. give her what she desires!! facials for all!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bram Stokers Dracula 2004-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: clitorises are longer than you think! go ahead, check Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shanghai 2004-07-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the loudest queef i ever heard?? it was a mighty vaginal thunderclap!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2004-04-13 From: the voices!!!! Comments: my anger wells up inside!! fuck this site!! fix it or kill it!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rastan 2004-02-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: ha!!! this is the day!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Maze Hunter 3-D 2004-02-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: of course a dog will lick gravy off of your balls. the question is whether or not it should Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex Kidd in Shinobi World 2004-02-09 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you live in a house of glass, Serrasalmus. take care when throwing stones Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy III: The Dragons Trap 2004-02-08 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i showered her with gifts again and again, but she still left me!! did i say gifts? i meant semen Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy 2004-02-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: No matter where I turn I am tormented by smegma. The vile cheesiness of it!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex Kidd: the Lost Stars 2004-02-07 From: the voices!!!! Comments: so much rage. rage bottled up. not just rage, though. that bottle is full of homosexuality Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Montezumas Revenge 2004-01-20 From: the voices!!!! Comments: a blanket made of sadness will not keep you warm Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Arcade Smash Hits 2004-01-20 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the monkey prattles on and on tonight. four more years? never!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lemmings 2004-01-20 From: the voices!!!! Comments: mush murdered them. they were adrift, helpless. it was wrong Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kings Quest 2003-12-23 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i shall nourish you all!! suckle me!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Psychic World 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the breakfast of champions? cunnilingus!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- SpellCaster 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: ah, to be a pair of panties!!! the sights and odors to take in!! the damp!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mortal Kombat 2 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: release...thy name is fellatio!!! spurt forth and shower them all with love!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sonic the Hedgehog Chaos 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: year after year i wait, and still no sex robots!! i must have my pleasure! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ghostbusters 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if cost is an issue, use a banana!! whatever will fit comfortably is fine. watch out for sharp edges, though! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Scramble Spirits 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: lesbianism is the truest love of all!!! tribadism, however, is mostly male fantasy Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dynamite Dux 2003-12-22 From: the voices!!!! Comments: vulvas!! vulvas in all their variety!!! what beauty!! what fragrance!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marble Madness 2003-12-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: i love her!!! she is brown on the outside, but pink on the inside! the contrast is hauntingly beautiful!! orgasm? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Casino Games 2003-12-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: ah, the redwood. my stars, what a phallus!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story 2003-12-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: every orifice violated!! bedsheets ruined! this is what you begged me for? slattern!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mortal Kombat 2003-12-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: man, this salad is awful! the cucumber tastes like vagina!! why, mother? why? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Captain Silver 2003-12-19 From: the voices!!!! Comments: deflowered by a hairbrush? the irony!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rescue Mission 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: germans say that they had no choice but to commit their crimes, but italians chose not to. believe not their lies!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- After Burner 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: if she will copulate with a dog, there is hope for me!! bright red penis! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Astro Warrior 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the fourchette!! what a wonderful place to smell and lick! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- PitPot 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: a baubon i understand, but made of leather?? is it up for the task? it will go where i dream to! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Zool 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: she cried out, "dilate me, my lover!!", but i could not. my kingdom for a erection!! oh, sweet tumescence! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Psycho Fox 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: with intromission thus completed, i wept aloud. my glans! my glans! the wetness drowns me!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fantasy Zone 2003-12-17 From: the voices!!!! Comments: you say football player, i say rapist. you say cheerleader, i say whore. Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Out Run 2003-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the cake is eaten away gradually, but it burns my penis too much to stand! thus go the ailments of venus!! damn it all!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rampage 2003-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: sorry, rabbit, but diabetes is for kids!!! carrots are for rabbits, bunnies, and vaginas! vaginas??? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Columns 2003-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: it smells of fish!! shall i taste? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Castle of Illusion 2003-12-16 From: the voices!!!! Comments: oh, to be a girl! then i could menstruate!! eggs!!! delicious eggs!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shadow of the Beast 2003-12-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: sasquatch eating out of garbage cans?? the indignity!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mirracle Warriors 2003-12-15 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they hurl invectives at me even as i feed them! i give them birdseed, can they not give me respect in return? my mother is not a whore!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cloud Master 2003-12-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: sandwiches made of golden farts! my god, the taste!! it tastes like boredom Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cheese Cat-Astrophe 2003-12-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: zachary taylor is dead! the cherries are to blame, but none can see the truth Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy III: The Dragons Trap 2003-12-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: the elastic has worn out!! what now? Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wonder Boy in Monster Land 2003-12-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: hundreds of millions cry out as one! i alone hear their screams!!! "why must we die in this tissue, we were meant for better things" Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Space Harrier 2003-12-14 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they caught Santa, but what good will it do? his gift to us is only more suffering!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Double Dragon 2003-10-05 From: the voices!!!! Comments: pink, brown, black, white, penises all Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Choplifter 2003-10-05 From: the voices!!!! Comments: telephones are how the find you!! they can see the rage Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aztec Adventure 2003-10-05 From: the voices!!!! Comments: he will show us the way!! erections for everyone!!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shanghai 2003-10-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: penis stolen by sawdust monkeys Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mortal Kombat 2003-10-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: pube fires start that way!!! the bananas did it!! Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Penguin Land 2003-10-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: they blamed Leonid, but it was the bees!! the fucking bees!! everywhere they go, like tiny dildos made of pain Rating: n/a -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pro Wrestling 2003-10-04 From: the voices!!!! Comments: tree ejaculate!!! it rains down in yellowness!! Rating: n/a

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All content © Chris Wopat 1997-2024. I probably should thank Sega here too. Thanks!